Category Archives: Anecdotes

Short stories

DO YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH?

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Mister, do you love Jesus?

That story that we told just a few weeks ago about the man that got on the aeroplane and couldn’t find a seat except in the central rows where there were very few people. He went to a place where he could see there was a seat right next to a little girl. He didn’t know that this little girl was a Down Syndrome child. Any of us who know about Down Syndrome know that children who are born with Down Syndrome are usually very affectionate and very lovely children to be with. They love affection themselves and they’re always pouring affection out on other people. They’re easy children to enjoy; they’re very enjoyable little ones to have.
So, he sat down beside the little one and he was wanting to get some rest for his eyes.

He was a businessman and so he shut his eyes hoping to get some sleep within the few hours that he was crossing the country in this plane.
He thought this is wonderful to get peace and quiet at last.
And then there was a tug at his sleeve and a little voice said, “Mister!”
And he said, “Yes, dear, what is it?”
She said, “Do you brush your teeth?!”
So he smiled and said, “Yes dear, I do!”
She said, “That’s good because then they won’t go bad!”
He thought ‘OK, well, that’s it, I’ve answered her question.’ But after a little while, another tug at his sleeve and the little voice again: “Mister!”
He said, “Yes, dear what is it?”
She said, “Do you smoke?”
He said, “No dear, I don’t smoke.”
She said, “That’s good, because some people who smoke, die!”
So, he thought, ‘Well, we got over that one, what’s next?!’

He sat back and there was a long pause this time. And then another tug at his sleeve.
He said, “Yes dear, what is it?”
She said, “Mister, do you love Jesus?”
He said, “Yes dear, I do.”
She said, “That’s good, because then you can go to heaven!”
So he sat back and thought ‘Let’s hope that’s the end of all the questions.’
He relaxed and was just about to go off to sleep and was just getting quite drowsy when there was another tug at his sleeve. “Mister!”
“Yes dear, what is it?”
“Do you see that man over the other side of you? Ask him if he brushes his teeth!”
So, this man didn’t know what to do, he thought, ‘Well OK, I’ll just have to pass it on as from the child. I don’t want to disappoint this little thing, she is so trusting,’ so he asked him, “Do you brush your teeth?!”
And so he went through the list until he came to the question she had asked him, ‘Ask him if he loves Jesus?’
He said, “The little one wants to know, do you love Jesus?”
This man said “Well, I don’t know what that means.”
“I’ll ask you again, do you love Jesus?” The man felt trapped now because he himself was a Christian.
He said, “I don’t understand the question.”
He said, “Well, let me explain it to you.”
And that way he began to give him the Gospel. That got him to tell the story of Jesus when he wouldn’t have done it of his own accord but a little girl, who was considered to be a little bit less than normal, managed to produce from him a testimony for the Lord Jesus for the man that he was talking to on the other side.
Before the plane landed, he had come to the Lord Jesus and put his faith in the Saviour, all because of a little girl like that.

BULLYING

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BULLYING

BULLYING - CRUMPLED PIECE OF PAPER

It is worth remembering that bullying also means:

  • Intimidation
  • Mistreatment
  • Oppression
  • Harassment
  • Victimisation
  • Hounding
  • Discrimination
  • Singling out

IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF THE BISCUITS

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 IT’S AMAZING WHAT WE ASSUME

He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, is folly
Proverbs 18:13

A PACKET OF BISCUITS

I looked up the meaning of the word Assumption and discovered that it meant:

  •  best guess
  •  idea
  •  belief
  •  notion
  •  theory
  •  guess
  •  hypothesis
  •  supposition

This got me thinking about how, when meeting someone for the first time, we tend to make spot judgments and assumptions about the person without actually knowing anything about them. It is so easy to be taken in with appearances, mannerisms, and how they talk or react to you during your first encounter.
I was in a hardware shop the other day making a few purchases and the man who served me was covered in tattoos and body piercings and after commenting on them, he told me it was his aim to have a complete body wrap, which meant that he wanted his entire body tattooed. I replied that although I could appreciate the complexity of some of the designs, which were beautifully done with magnificent colours, it was something that I would never contemplate, to which he replied that the looks and comments he received on a daily basis were quite comical. It would appear that he loved anything and everything to do with Japanese culture, art and designs and that this was in actual fact, the very basis of each and every tattoo he had. He went on to tell me that he had taken his wife and two young children to the local swimming pool over the weekend and ended up with an entire corner of the poolside grass area to himself and the family because nobody wanted to sit anywhere near him!
I left the shop with my purchases realising that, had I not engaged him in conversation, I would have departed thinking that he was a very strange person and one I would not be inviting home for tea and biscuits. Instead I was amazed at how pleasant our brief encounter was. He was very nice, well spoken and obviously a well-educated chap and this got me thinking about how easy it is to become judge, jury and executioner within a matter of seconds and it is only by the Grace of God that we are, at times, pulled up sharply and become ashamed for having such an attitude. We automatically assume that we know better and that anyone who does not fit into our mould, is immediately suspect. Which reminds me of a short story I heard which illustrates just how sensitive this issue is:
There was once a lady who had purchased a packet of biscuits and sat down in the airport lounge to relax and read her newspaper whilst waiting for her flight to be called.
She heard a rustling noise and looked up to see a man beside her helping himself to the biscuits.
Not wanting to make a scene, she leaned over and took one herself, hoping that by her actions, the man would get the message.
Then she heard more rustling.
She could not believe it! The man was helping himself to another biscuit and as she watched out of the corner of her eye, he took yet another!
Looking down she noticed that there was only one left!
She watched in utter disbelief as he broke the last remaining biscuit in two and pushed one half across to her, whilst popping the other half into his mouth and then promptly stood up and left.
She was still furious as her flight was announced over the speaker system.
Can you begin to imagine how she felt when she opened her handbag to get her ticket out – and found her unopened packet of biscuits!

There are issues in this story which we need to address.

  1. If we are being honest with ourselves, we all assumed that the man, the stranger, was helping himself to her biscuits.
  2. We all assumed that the lady showed remarkable restraint in allowing him to take each biscuit without saying anything.
  3. We all assumed that this was a display of Christian charity at its best.
  4. We all assumed that he was somewhat ungrateful for not showing the slightest appreciation for her sharing her biscuits with him.

Now that we know the truth, perhaps we need to look at the issues from a different angle:

  1. Consider what the stranger thought when the lady decided to help herself to his biscuits.
  2. Consider his reaction to her down to the last remaining biscuit.
  3. He broke it in two and shared it with her!
  4. Do we still consider ourselves superior to others?
  5. Are we not all guilty of making assumptions about people without knowing anything about them?
  6. I think the answer to that question is: YES!

THE BLACK DOT

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THE BLACK DOT

A BLACK DOT

The Black Dot: A Beautiful and Inspiring Story! This beautiful story has a simple, yet important message. I hope as many people as possible give it a read. I know I am happy I read it, as it gave me a few things to think about in my own life. Sometimes it is the simplest of stories that make us ponder the most.

One day their professor entered the classroom and told the students to prepare for a surprise test. The students waited patiently at their desks anxiously wondering what was going to happen.
The professor handed out the exam paper, face down as usual and once he had done that he asked them to turn their papers over.
To everyone’s surprise there were no questions on the paper only a neatly drawn black dot in the centre of the page.
On seeing the perplexed looks on their faces he proceeded to explain what he wanted them to do.
I want you to look very carefully at the exam paper and write about what you see.

The students were very confused and began to do as they were asked.
At the end of the exam the professor collected all the papers and began to read out loud what each student had written.
It soon became evident that all of them wrote about the black dot and its position on the page.

The classroom was silent as he read out the last of the papers and began to explain:

I am not going to grade you on this exam, all I wanted to do was to give you something to think about.

  • No-one wrote about the paper.
  • No-one mentioned how spotlessly clean it was and that it had been cut using the most up to date guillotine.
  • No-one mentioned that every single corner of the page was a perfect 90 degree angle.
  • No-one spotted that the paper itself was an exact size and that it had a semi glossy finish on both sides.
  • Everyone without exception focused on the black dot and nothing else!

This is the message I want to get across to you this morning:

  • We all focus on the black dot which represents the way we are in our daily lives.
  • We have a beautifully prepared piece of pristine white paper to observe, enjoy and use – and yet we focus our attention on the black dot.
  • This pristine piece of paper represents our lives.
  • Our life is a gift given to us by our wonderful Creator.
  • We have every reason in the world to celebrate the wonder of His love and care for us.
  • We have every reason to be grateful for the very air that we breathe and for our friends and family.
  • We have every reason in the world to be thankful for the miracles which happen around us every single day of our lives.
  • However we insist on focusing on the black dots in our lives.
  • We focus on our health problems.
  • We focus on our lack of money to do the things we want to.
  • We focus on difficulties with family members and petty arguments.
  • We focus on disappointments with friends.
  • The list is almost endless.

The black dots in our lives are so small when compared with everything we have in this beautiful world of ours, but sadly they are the ones that pollute our minds. They poison and infect everything and everybody we come into contact with. They spoil and defile EVERYTHING!

I want to urge you to take your mind off the black dots and focus on Jesus and the Love He has for each and every one of us.

  • Learn of Him by reading and meditating on the Scriptures.
  • Speak to Him often.
  • Concentrate your attention on Him.
  • Sing along with the Chorus writer who penned these words:

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His Glory and Grace.

BOB’S LAST WISHES

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ASSUMPTIONS – THAT’S ALL IT IS

Listening in on other people’s conversations can be very interesting, but it can also bring with it a host of problems and raise many questions such as:

  • Did I hear correctly?
  • Have I listened to the conversation from the beginning?
  • Did I miss anything?
  • Did I understand the context?
  • Should I have been listening in the first place?

Our story begins with a man called Bob Brown who is on his deathbed and knows that he does not have long to go on this earth. He is lying in a hospital bed surrounded by his nurse, his wife, his two daughters and his son and he asks for two additional people to be present as witnesses. He specifically requests that one of them have a video recorder to enable him to place on record his final wishes. Once all have assembled and the recorder is functioning he begins to speak:

To my son Robert, I want you to take the Mayfair houses. To my first daughter, I want you to take the apartments over in the East End. To my second daughter, I want you to take over the office blocks near the city centre. And finally to my dear wife, I want you to take over all the residential buildings on the banks of the river.

The nurse and witnesses are astounded as they did not realise that Bob had such extensive holdings and as Bob slipped away into eternity, the nurse says, Mrs Brown, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property.
To which his wife replied, Property? There’s no property, he had a paper round!

I have chosen the heading of today’s article deliberately because there are a great many people who assume that there is no place called Hell, and if there was such a place, it would be the final resting place of mass murderers, rapists and child abusers and definitely NOT a place for ordinary people who do not harm others, who give to charities and try their level best to live decently. I know of one man who states quite categorically that he has always been a Christian. That he has never got drunk, that he has never stolen anything or deliberately harmed anyone and he is quite adamant that this attitude will be looked upon favourably by God. Does this ring any bells? I’m sure it does. The fact that there has never. ever been anyone who has always been a Christian, does not seem to worry him in the slightest, when it should, in actual fact, ring alarm bells loud and clear!
The assumption that God would look approvingly on our efforts to live a clean life without an acknowledgement of sin and true repentance is the height of stupidity because it completely ignores what Jesus did for us on the Cross of Calvary!
The assumption that God, if there is one, would send people to Hell is mocked and ridiculed from one end of the compass to the other. When asked how it is that they have reached this conclusion, the answers and suppositions are ridiculous in the extreme, simply because they do not accept the Scriptures as the final authority in these matters. They have no solid evidence other than their own opinions, which as we all know, can and do, change like the wind. Sadly though what they fail to recognise is that if they do not wish to have God around them in life, they will certainly not have Him around in eternity. By then it will be too late.
One of the world’s greatest scientists Michael Faraday, on his deathbed, said:

Assumptions! I know nothing of assumptions, I am resting on certainties. I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that He is able to keep that which I have committed unto Him against that day.
2 Timothy 1:12

THE BARBER

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THE REASON FOR PAIN AND SUFFERING

THE BARBER

This is one of the best explanations of why God allows pain and suffering that I have seen.

A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.
As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said:

I don’t believe that God exists.
Why do you say that? Asked the customer.

Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn’t exist.

Tell me, if God exists, why are there be so many sick people?
Why are there so many abandoned children?
If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain.
I can’t imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things.

The customer thought for a moment, but didn’t respond because he didn’t want to start an argument, so after the barber had finished his job, he left the shop.
Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and an untrimmed beard.
He looked dirty and unkempt.
The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:

You know what?
Barbers do not exist!
How can you say that? Asked the surprised barber.
I am here, and I am a barber.
What are you talking about?
I have just worked on you!

No! The customer exclaimed.
Barbers don’t exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside.

Ah, but barbers DO exist! replied the barber.
That’s what happens when people do not come to me.

Exactly! Replied the customer.
That’s the point!
God DOES exist!
That’s what happens when people do not go to Him.
That’s what happens when people don’t look to Him for guidence and help in their lives.
That’s why there’s so much pain and suffering in the world.

THE MAYONNAISE JAR

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When things in your life seem almost too much to handle.
When 24 hours in a day doesn’t seem enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and two cups of coffee.

A Christian teacher stood before his class and had some items in front of him.  When the class began, he picked up a large empty mayonnaise jar and quietly started to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.

The teacher then picked up a box of pebbles and poured it into the jar.
He shook the jar lightly and the pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.

The teacher next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.  Of course the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full and the students responded with a unanimous yes.

The teacher then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.  “Now”, said the teacher as the laughter subsided, I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things – your love of Jesus, the Bible, your Christian walk, your testimony, your wife/husband, your family.
The things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the things that matter, like your job, house, and car.
The sand is everything else – the small stuff.
If you put the sand into the jar first, the teacher said, there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important.
So pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness, Love God with all your heart and mind, Take time to really study your Bible and honour God in all that you do.
There will always be time to clean the house and fix the dripping tap.
Take care of the golf balls first – the things that really matter and set your priorities.”

  The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and enquired what the coffee represented.
The teacher smiled and said:  I’m glad you asked.  It just goes to show that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.

SHOES IN CHURCH

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  I showered and shaved and adjusted my tie.
I got there and sat in a pew just in time.
Bowing my head in prayer as I closed my eyes.
I saw the shoe of the man next to me.
It was touching my own.
I sighed.

With plenty of room on either side, I thought,
Why must our soles touch?
It bothered me, ….. his shoe touching mine.
But it didn’t bother him much.

A prayer began:

‘Our Father’………. I thought, this man with the shoes has no pride.
They’re dusty, worn and scratched.
Even worse there are holes on the side!
‘Thank You for your blessings’ …. the prayer went on.
To which the shoe man replied with a quiet ‘Amen’

I tried to focus on the prayer…..
But my thoughts were on his shoes again.
Aren’t we supposed to look our best
When walking into Church?

Well this certainly isn’t it! I thought,
Glancing toward the floor.
Then the prayer ended and the songs of praise began.

The shoe man was certainly loud ……..
Sounding proud as he sang.
His voice lifted the rafters, his hands raised high.
The Lord could surely hear the shoe mans voice from the sky.

It was time for the offering and what I threw in was steep.
I watched as the shoe man reached into his pockets so deep.
I saw what he pulled out and saw what he put in.
Then I heard a soft ‘clink’ as the silver hit the tin.

The sermon really bored me ….. to tears that is no lie.
It was the same for the shoe man, for tears flowed from his eyes.

At the end of the service, as is custom here.
We must greet new visitors and show them good cheer.
I felt moved somehow, and wanted to meet the shoe man.

So after the prayer, I reached over and shook his hand.
He was old and his skin was wrinkled.
His hair was a mess.
But I thanked him for coming ….. for being our guest.

My name is Charlie he said, I’m glad to meet you my friend.
Although there were tears in his eyes, he had a large grin.
Wiping away the tears he began to speak.

I’ve been coming here for months, he said.
And you are the first to say Hi.
I know my appearance is not like the rest.
But I do try to look my best.

I clean and polish my shoes before my long walk.
But by the time I get here they are dirty and dusty like chalk.

My heart filled with pain and I swallowed to hide my tears.
As he continued to apologize for daring to sit so near.
He said, ‘When I get here I know I must look a sight’.
But I thought if I could touch you then maybe our souls might unite.

I was silent for a moment, not knowing what to say.
Knowing in my heart it would pale in comparison whatever I said.
So I spoke from my heart and not from my head.

‘Oh you have touched me,’ I said.
And you have taught me in part,
That the best of any man should be found in his heart.

The rest I thought, The shoe man will never know.
Just how thankful I really am.
That his dirty shoe touched my Soul!